Saturday I woke up with much chagrin at the discovery of our coffee machine failing to percolate. It’s a good thing we had a backup or my neighbors would have seen me, and all my morning glory, begging for coffee.
I have decided to say a few words about the dearly departed, if I might.
Oh Mr. Coffee coffee maker, we wish you speed in your journey to coffee maker heaven. You were perky in the morning. Always bubbly, presumably in glib fashion, for me to behold even after I pushed your buttons in the morning.
I loved you best of all the inanimate objects I had in my life. I would plug you in at night and you were always ready for me in the morning.
Now that I think about it, without a word you single handedly assisted in hundreds of thousands of bitter yet warm mornings. You were simple, straight forward and brought me joy without speaking a word.
I certainly wish more humans could be just like you Mr. Coffee Coffee Maker. Thank you and I bid you adieu.
P.S. We plan to use your parts for back-up parts for our new Mr. Coffee. Please be not jealous. Our memories of you could never be as replaceable as you actually are.